Thursday 6th of March 2008
It's that time of year to take our annual senior citizen test.
Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles.
As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it!
Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.
Take the test presented here to determine if you're losing it or not.
The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you've made your answer.
OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.
1. What do you put in a toaster?
Answer: 'bread.' If you said 'toast,' give up now and do something else.
Try not to hurt yourself.
If you said, bread, go to Question 2.
2. Say ' silk' five times. Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink?
Answer: Cows drink water. If you said 'milk,' don't attempt the next question.
Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat.
Content yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Auto World.
However, if you said 'water', proceed to question 3.
3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks,
what is a green house made from?
Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said 'green bricks,' why are you still reading these???If you said 'glass,' go on to Question 4.
4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany
(If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany .)
Anyway, during the flight, two engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine
is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do
so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of 'no man's land' between East Germany
and West Germany .
Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany , West Germany , or no man's land'?
Answer: You don't bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce and you must stop.
If you said, 'You don't bury survivors', proceed to the next question.
5. Without using a calculator!
You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales .
In London , 17 people get on the bus.
In Reading , six people get off the bus and nine people get on.
In Swindon , two people get off and four g et on.
In Cardiff , 1 1 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea , three people get off and five people get on .
In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!
Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!
Never mind, it part of getting old.....
source: http://johns-jokes.com
Your Annual Dementia Test
It's that time of year to take our annual senior citizen test.
Exercise of the brain is as important as exercise of the muscles.
As we grow older, it's important to keep mentally alert. If you don't use it, you lose it!
Below is a very private way to gauge your loss or non-loss of intelligence.
Take the test presented here to determine if you're losing it or not.
The spaces below are so you don't see the answers until you've made your answer.
OK, relax, clear your mind and begin.
1. What do you put in a toaster?
Answer: 'bread.' If you said 'toast,' give up now and do something else.
Try not to hurt yourself.
If you said, bread, go to Question 2.
2. Say ' silk' five times. Now spell 'silk.' What do cows drink?
Answer: Cows drink water. If you said 'milk,' don't attempt the next question.
Your brain is over-stressed and may even overheat.
Content yourself with reading a more appropriate literature such as Auto World.
However, if you said 'water', proceed to question 3.
3. If a red house is made from red bricks and a blue house is made from blue bricks and a pink house is made from pink bricks and a black house is made from black bricks,
what is a green house made from?
Answer: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said 'green bricks,' why are you still reading these???If you said 'glass,' go on to Question 4.
4. It's twenty years ago, and a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over Germany
(If you will recall, Germany at the time was politically divided into West Germany and East Germany .)
Anyway, during the flight, two engines fail. The pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine
is also failing, decides on a crash landing procedure. Unfortunately the engine fails before he can do
so and the plane fatally crashes smack in the middle of 'no man's land' between East Germany
and West Germany .
Where would you bury the survivors? East Germany , West Germany , or no man's land'?
Answer: You don't bury survivors. If you said ANYTHING else, you're a dunce and you must stop.
If you said, 'You don't bury survivors', proceed to the next question.
5. Without using a calculator!
You are driving a bus from London to Milford Haven in Wales .
In London , 17 people get on the bus.
In Reading , six people get off the bus and nine people get on.
In Swindon , two people get off and four g et on.
In Cardiff , 1 1 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea , three people get off and five people get on .
In Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then arrive at Milford Haven.
What was the name of the bus driver?
Answer: Oh, for crying out loud!
Don't you remember your own name? It was YOU!!
Never mind, it part of getting old.....
source: http://johns-jokes.com
Probably the fastest joke site on the web thanks to Pingdom
Find free jokes including Sex Joke of the Day, Sexist Blonde Jokes and crazy stand-up comedy jokes and Little Johnny all at Johns-Jokes.com.
Humor to bust a gut with our funny, Obama, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, sports, relationship jokes which are all funny, clean or some that are dirty and a bit close to the mark!
Carlos Ray Chuck Norris, Paddy the Irishman jokes and more hilarious laughter all found at Johns- Jokes.com
Funny faces, pictures, animal images, for yourself and friends, to smile and laugh at them all! Ideal for folks without Life Insurance!
We do not tell Dirty, offensive and rude jokes but you can! 'even good for adults and youngsters suffering Acne :)
Our Comedy Sketches, Knock Knock jokes make for hilarious laughter, Wicked wit, short stories, crazy quotes, and strive to have a broad range and nothing too dirty!
Find free jokes including Sex Joke of the Day, Sexist Blonde Jokes and crazy stand-up comedy jokes and Little Johnny all at Johns-Jokes.com.
Humor to bust a gut with our funny, Obama, Yo Mama, Redneck, lawyer, animal, sports, relationship jokes which are all funny, clean or some that are dirty and a bit close to the mark!
Carlos Ray Chuck Norris, Paddy the Irishman jokes and more hilarious laughter all found at Johns- Jokes.com
Funny faces, pictures, animal images, for yourself and friends, to smile and laugh at them all! Ideal for folks without Life Insurance!
We do not tell Dirty, offensive and rude jokes but you can! 'even good for adults and youngsters suffering Acne :)
Our Comedy Sketches, Knock Knock jokes make for hilarious laughter, Wicked wit, short stories, crazy quotes, and strive to have a broad range and nothing too dirty!