Too many jokes to read in one day?


10 Husbands, Still a Virgin

21 st Century...

A blonde was summoned to court to...

A Brazillian Wax Job - OUCH

A cigarette shortens your life by...

a cowboy and the indians

A Duke was hunting in the forest

A few answers to commonly asked pregnancy questions by both men and women.

A Greek and an Italian were drinking coffee...

A heart rending story and a compassionate man

A Linguistic Professor in A Lecturer about the English Language

A little old lady is walking...

A lonely guy...

A man goes to the doctors...

A man walks into a public toilet...

A man went to visit

A Message from your Prime Minister

A new ending for an old fairy tale.

A penny for your thoughts

A present for the wife

A riddle

A telephone conversation

A Truly Inspirational Tale Of Kindness

A vicar books into a motel

A woman goes shopping in Big W

A woman writes to the IT Technical support Guy

Abstain from Sex

Adam got caught speeding yesterday.

Aeroplane crash

After the oilfield blowout

All Done

Always check

An 80 Year Old Man

An Australian Genie!

An engineer, a psychologist, and a theologian

Anger Management, I do feel better!!!

Another crude one about a fat lady and her Elvis tattoo

Another Speeding Motorist Is Caught

Are you an American?

Art critic

Australian Letter of the Year

Bad Day For The Undertaker

Bank Robber

Be prepared for this interview question

Beer Cannon Montage

Being Totally Honest:

Best joke from a British competition

Beware - crude but funny

Biggest Lies and Porky Pies

Billy Connolly's 14 things I hate about everybody

Blessings

Bob Hill and his wife Betty are vacationing in Europe.

Breakfast Joke

British Weather

Burglar Deterrent

Calling in Sick

Can you read this !!??

Caption Contest

Cell Mate

Charles Atlas

Chatting up on the beach

Cheesy Valentine’s Day Jokes

Choking

City Boy

Coming out of the closet

Computer help desk support calls revisited

Computer Users

Consider yourself warned.

Cosmetic Surgery - the Boob Job

Couple on their first date

Cowboy Logic

Creative Answering Machine Messages

Curtain Rods.... a happy ending

Darling when we make love do you...

Deadly Habits

Deodrant stick instructions

Did I do that and a letter from the boss

Different Nations Corporations

Distasteful jokes to pass some time......

Do you realize that the only time in our lives when we like to get old is when we're kids?

Doctor's orders

Dog For Sale: OR free to good home.

Don't Miss The Amazing Scotsman

Drink to that

Duck walks into a bar...

Economics simplified

Encore

Escaped Murderer

Extracts from police car video arrests

Family togetherness.............

Fat free - for all those following a diet

Fatherly Advice from the Priest

Female Logic

Finally, A Blonde Guy Joke!

First night and still a virgin after being married before

Five Tips For A Woman

Food Shortage

Forgive your enemies.....

Four Nuns with St Peter at the Pearly Gates

Free Sex With Petrol Station Fillup

From now on I resign from being an adult

Funny Story, possibly true?

Gentle Thoughts for Today

Getting A Round Of Golf, What to tell the missus

Going Camping.....

Golf caddies

Golfers be grateful

Good Lawyer

Google reveals the cause of India’s Population Growth

Grandparents and kids

Groaner about a Honda motorcycle.

Guess who one the bet.

Handy Latin Phrases by Phil Brodie

Harley Davidson

Health & Fitness - Factfile. Questions & Answers

Heart broken

Help hubby

Hilarious quotes concerning the better half

Home Alone

How Come?

How hot is it in Hell?

How Smart is Your Right Foot?

How to Dump a Man

How to place the right person in the right job?

How to subtly mention your iPhone when picking up a girl in the bar

Hurt?

I got a phone call today.

I want Grandma

I'm Lost

If Only they Had a Jewish Mother

In Case

Income taxes!

Insulting druggist

Internet proverbs

Irish humour

Is Socialism a Joke?

It is important for men to remember that as women get older

It's always the kids that suffer

Jewish divorce

Judge and the Prostitute

Just Fred gets stopped by the traffic police for speeding

King Arthur and the Witch:

Ladies Night Out

Latest report - Calories Used

Lawyer jokes

Lent with Bubba

Letters from son at college to his father

Life is short……………..if it needs to be paid, get it done soonest before its too late!!

Lisa was called to serve for jury duty...

Little Johhny on the train

Little Johnny and his balloon

Little Johnny and the S&M magazines

Little Johnny drawing

Little Johnny is Very Scared

Little Johnny wanted a watch just like his friend Jimmy

Little Johnny's mother decided tell him all about...

Little Sister

Lola's Graduation

Lost Purse

Love Quotes

Ma and Pa were two hillbillies living out on a farm up in the hills.

Mammogram test preparation exercises

Marriage councellor's solution

Maud, Mavis and Ethel

Memory test for the three elderly gentlemen

Midget with a speech impediment

Misunderstanding

More amaing but useless facts

More Tee Shirt Lines and Slogans

Murphy's laws

My apologies to .........

My Dear Husband

My name is dave

Necessary Gift for Christmas

New Bumper Stickers

New Living Will Form

Niagraa Falls Tour Guide

No calls

No work today

Not a Joke but an Oldies Music Quiz instead

Nothing Really Matress

Nymphomaniac Convention

Oh dear! I'm very sorry

Old and Best Joke from Ancient Rome

Old Hollywood Squares

Olympic condoms

On no not another Puerto Rican!!!

One for the Brits about Sean Connery and Cilla Black interviewed by Michael Parkinson

One from the Philipines

One Night In A Bar

One-liners on Marriage - Researched by Alan Turnham

Organic

Oxymorons galore

Paddy was walking through...

Password!!

Perfect Puns

Peter Kaye-isms., True. For those that may have missed it.

Pick up line?

Playing Cowboy

Poetry or Prose?

Politician Telling the Truth

Poor Dave

Potentially vs Realistically

Proof The World Is Nuts

Public apology

Putting out the cat before leaving for a night out on the town

Qucik answer

Quickie

Quotations from Oscar Wilde

Quotes from the management

Rain on your parade

Real letter to the bank

Recruiting for the Air Force

Relationships Before And After

Restaurant customer orders a squid - groaner

Rodney Dangerfield quotes

Room Service - Tenjewberrymuds

Russian Roulette played in Africa

Safety a work: All aboard - Far too many passengers

Safety at work: Forklift and two ladders

Safety at work: Huge cockup

Safety at work: Special Delivery

Safety at Work: Suspended

Safety at work: you need the motor running

Say NO to Cadburys merging with Nestle

Second try!

Sentenced for Stealing

Sex in the Irish Tradition

Shipwrecked On A Desert Island

Sid the Inventor

Small Boy wrote to Santa Claus

SMS one liners

Some funny marriage quotes

Some Wonderful Proverbs:

Speaking of Dying. . .

Squashed Frog

Steve Jobs, CEO

Street vendor and the lawyer

Suicide bomb on the beach

SUV Black Box Voice Recorders Last 16 Seconds Before the Crash

Tae a far-apologies to Robbie Burns

Talking frog

Ten Laws of Computing

Texas Itch

The 'phone call

The Alternative Ten Laws of Computing

The Ant and the Grasshopper

The barber and Community Service

The Best Bible Salesman

The big night

The bookmaker stopped at the Even Steven Inn...

The brain is a wonderful organ

The building site

The Call of Nature

The chemist

The Circle of Life

The Confession After the Honeymoon

The Courting Couple

The Diet of pool balls - a Groaner

The diplomatic husband

The doctor's prescription

The duck hunter

The Elephant and the Crocodile

The expert's analysis

The female brain cell

The first night

The genie

The Golden Telephone

The Hamster

The Hi-Tech Milking Machine

The Husband Store and The Wives Store Across The Road

The Indoctrination

The interview with the candidate with little experience

The kid

The life science examination

The Lonely Frog

The married couple and the wife discovers that her husband was not in bed with her

The medical distinction between Guts and Balls.

The Mongolian case of ...

The Nervous Newly Ordained Priest Learning About Confessions

The New Dress

The new rooster

The Novice Journalist

The oil shortage

The old man and his young wife

The pet shop

The police recruit interview question

The Postman Pat

The Priests bathtime

The Queen saw from her yacht

The Really Mad Mum

The robot bar-tender

The scene at the accident

The Senility Prayer

The Ship's Magician and the Parrot

The Smoke Theory

The stay of execution

The Suppository

The talking parrot

The Three Little Pigs

The Ultimate Beer Goggles

The Very Tired Nurse's Rectal Thermometer

The wife returned from the doctor

The World's Funniest Joke -- Official...

Ther retired gynecologist switches careers and becomes acar mechanic

There's a few guys who always get together

Things Only a Mom Can Teach

This poem of the year

Three big bad bikers and the trucker

Three hard to find Valentine cards

Three Vampires in a Bar

Tiger Woods

To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be:

Tommy Cooper Specials

Topical

Traveling in New Zealand

Trout fishing

TV Position

Two Free Tickets To The Show

Two joints

Two nuns travelling in a car

Two priests decide to go to Hawaii for a vacation...

Two young lovers on a romantic winter vacation

Unfaithful wife caught by the private detective.

Vasectomy

Vijayakanth's Dialogues in English

Want to live longer?

Wee Willie and Wanda

What Is A Fox Pass?

When a Lady Has To Fart

When it's raining..

Where do pets come from? from the Book of Genesis

Who said that?

Whoops from the police officer who caught the man speeding

Why Do Men Die First?

Why there are no snakes in Ireland

Wife's work on the sly

Womanly Truisms

Wooden leg

World's easiest quiz

Yoga style and the two old ladies discussing their sexual activity

You finish?

You try your best but....

Your Day Is Coming

100 Dollar Question

23rd Psalm

A blonde's last word.

A bunch of guys were working

A circus magician

A daughter's letter from her college to her parents.

A Farang came out of a toilet...

A Flat-chested Young Lady Went To Dr. Smith

A guaranteed quick get rich scheme

A Hermaphrodite

A Little Boy's Prayers

A little old lady with a farting problem

A love story..

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery.

A man was called in for an audit by Revenue Canada

A man with a dog walks into a bar

A Mexican woodpecker and a Canadian woodpecker...

A new kind of car

A Pilot's Story

A Professon lectures on the evils of marijuana

A Rough Night

A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an organization.

A very fishy groaner to beat them all

A Visit To The IRS - Internal Revenue Service?

A woman meets a handsomely gorgeous man in a bar.

A young boy, about eight...

Accident report

Adam was created first...

After a long night of making love...

After the operation

All I Know About Computers I Learned From My Mum

Always check your child's homework

An Act of Charity

An Economist Was Leaving His Office Building

An Old Man and a Horny Old Geezer

Angry Motorist

Another miracle: Water to Wine

Another surgeon

Are you included in the following one hundred?

As I Mature

Aviation testing the strength of an airplane windshield

Bad memory

Bastard!

Bear facts

Beer in the eyes of babes

Believe it or not , These are real 911 calls!

Best mate

Beware when you come home!

Bill and Sam the long term buddies

Billy Connolly's Chain Letter

Blonde at work and wanted a few days off work

Bobbitt Family Update

Breaking News: Man killed on golf course

Broken Fence in DC

Buying my first condoms

Calm down

Can't Miss Pick-Up Lines

Car Accident

Cell Mates

Charles noticed the mother and child in the supermarket

Chatup line

Cherry Vanilla Ice Cream

Christopher Columbus's first words

Clean underwear

Coming to an airport near you

Computer Printer Repair

Computers & Internet - General - Get The Most From The I.T. Dept.

Consultants in the restaurant

Cosmetic Surgery - The Full Works

Courtesy of the Big Yin - Billy Connolly for those not in the know.

Crabs

cross examination

Customs declarations

Darwin Awards

Dear Diary,

Depressed

Did you enjoy the sex?

Different Thermometers

Distressed Widow from Scotland

Doberman Dies

Doctor's prescription

Dog's Letters to God

Don't you love me no more

Driving

Dumb Blonde Waitress?

Edinburgh Fringe Festival winning jokes

Encyclopaedia Britannica advertised in the For Sale columns

Essex girls moved to Glasgow?

Facts about reindeer and Father Christmas

Famous composers and movie stars

Father O'Malley went to visit Patrick Shanahan in the hosptital.

Fatherly advice to his daughter

Female Prayers

Financial Difficulties

First Night for the newly married virgin with a penis phobia

Flight attendants

For my 75th birthday my wife gave me...

Fortunate

Fourth Marriage

Free strips of paper

From The London Times: A Well-Planned Retirement

G W Bush was sleeping when suddenly he awoke

Geography of a woman

Getting even

Going to Jail

Golf Grammar Lesson

Gone doody

Good luck Mr Gorsky

Gorilla

Grant me Serenity

Gross but Innovative

Guns, doctors and lawyers

Hank was a not too smart kind of guy.

Harry the Eagle

Health & Fitness - Old Age - Dangerous Driving Penalties

Heart Murmur

Her Own Way

Hired help

Honeymoon confessions

How did you get the injury?

How little Johnny sold toothbrushes

How the internet was all started, it is true, honest!

How to get 3 days off?

How To Recycle a Condom...

How to turn a woman on

I already paid

I Hate My Job

I was just visiting some friends

I'm not Happy

If there is anyone here who knows why these two should not be wed...

In Pharmacology.............

Indian Mating Season

Insurance claim for the lawyer and the engineer

iPhone Jokes

Ironic pictures that are worth a thousand...

Is that rain?

It is not polite

It's an age thing

Job frustration support group

Judgement day is here so...

Just got to be Irish

King Frederick II Visit To A Jail

Last Will and Testament

Latest virus

Lawyers and charity

Leroy from Port Antonio

Letters to Santa Claus

Like Father Like...

Literally

Little Johnny And The Circus Clown

Little Johnny and his Grandma

Little Johnny ask his teacher ’is that sex’?

Little Johnny in biology class

Little Johnny learning about logical thinking

Little Johnny wanted to...

Little Johnny's teacher asks - Who Said That?

Liver & cheese

London Times Obituary

Lost the bet

Love Story

Magic Wand

Man of the House

Marriage or Fish license?

Maybe an Hemophiliac

Mental Health Ponderisms

Might as well

Moan!

More commentator bloomers

Motel of the future

Murphy's Laws of Sex

My best friend

My Dixie wrecked.

My one armed friend

Nelson at Trafalgar

New Definitions

New name for a beer

Nick Griffin again!

No laughing matter

Noah's Ark

Not one to complain...

Now this is what some would call a very loving wife.

Obituary about Larry La Prise, the man who wrote 'The Hokey Kokey'

Oh shit!

Old Butch the Rooster

Old Love

Olympic Games 2012

On the Bus.

One for the Brits' about the new EU Directive No. 456179

One liners version: 001

One night while laying in bed

Open the door and let me in...

Out Of The Frying Pan & Into The Deep Fryer......

Paddy

Parking fine

Past and present generations

Perfume

Petrol substitute

Pinch my nipples

Please ban fox hunting in Colorado

Poker Night

Pommie in the crapper

Pope and Jews - The Power of Interpretation

Power of the Badge

Proper grammar

Public service announcements

Pyramid of Jokes

Question Clarification

Quotations

Quotations: Sir Winston Churchill

Quotes I like

Random thoughts from 25-35 year old people

Real Life Cybersex

Red Cross

Remember those school field trips and farm sounds ?

Right and Wrong

Rodney's one liners

Roping A Deer------- (Names have been removed to protect the Stupid!)

Rye Bread

Safety a work: Scaffolding

Safety at Work: Forklift with Bomb

Safety at Work: Ladder in water

Safety at work: Stepladder and a paint tin

Safety at work: Tower scaffolding

Same Doc?

School of Psychiatry at Harvard University

Secret Men's stuff

Service fee

Sex is like a restaurant

Shopping for her very first bra

Singing in the Shower

Smart Dog

Snappy answers

some more puns and wise words

Something to look forward to...

Special sandals

Squirrels At Church

Still good friends

Stress

Summer is near

Swim

Take a number

Tapeworm Cure

Ten Thoughts to Ponder

Thailand headlines

The (i)rate of exchange

The American Couple in Paris

The Aussie, a Yank and a Canadian

The Battle of Trafalgar - revisited

The best cure for persistent headaches! !

The biker and the little old lady

The bored couple

The brain is a wonderful organ.,,

The burglar

The car boot sale

The Christmas Present from the boyfriend got mixed up in the shop

The colonel's order

The Confesston

The Cowboy

The diet recommended by the doctor for the blonde

The Dirty Professor

The Doctors Waiting Room

The Dyslexic Cop

The elephant and the turtle

The facts of life

The fifteen dollar Porche

The first witness

The GI

The golfer and the leprechaun

The hand warmer

The hinge and the teapot

The hypnotist at the Orpheum opening night

The Inexperienced Curry Taster

The inventor

The last argument

The lion and the gorilla

The lottery winner

The married couple and the wife was fishing for compliments

The medical distinction between Guts and Balls.

The moral of the story

The New bull was not performing

The New iTit Musical Breast Implant

The New Store in Town . . .

The nun in Hooters

The old gentleman walks into a bar

The operation

The Philosophy of Ambiguity

The poor Pastor's wife returned from shopping...

The Preacher and the Pig

The Primary School Counsellor

The quest to produce beautiful children

The Reason

The Rules of Chocolate.....

The school teachers on a field trip

The Sex Athlete Marathon Man

The Shy Guy in the Singles Bar

The sneezing woman

The stowaway

The Surrogate Father

The tandem story

The time of reckoning

The unemployed married couple

The virgin

The Wisdom you can find on Toilet Walls

The young couple

There is always a solution

Thermos flask

Things that are difficult to say when you're drunk:

This Won't Hurt A Bit...

Three bulls discussing the arrival of a new bull

Three men commit suicide by jumping off the top of a building

Three wise monkeys for sale in the pet shop

Tim and Sam

To my dear wife...

Tommy Cooper Witticisms

Tourists Momento's - another groaner

Tree huggers

True Friendship... "Aussie Style"

Twenty Dollars

Two gay men have a baby....

Two lawyers stranded on a desert island

Two Nuns Visit the Zoo

Two sisters inherit a ranch

UFO runs short of fuel and lands...

Universal Laws

Vaseline

Visiting friends

Watch the man on the left and not the girl

West Yorkshire Police Statement:

What Religion is Your Partner's Bra?

When English is your second language.....

When the thrill is gone from the marriage!

Who enjoys sex more, a man or a woman?

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire...

Who’s your daddy - from Manchester women

Why Jesus was an Aussie

Why?

Wine for Seniors

Women have all the luck

Wooden Leg Insurance

Worrying works

You are addicted to your computer when

You have to love some drunks

You want me to do what...

Zen and the wisdom from Maharish

16 years

8 months pregnant

A Boob Poem

A cat named Jesus?

A computer instructor's observation

A Day at Golf with Dave and Fred

A farmer buys a condom

A fricken Elephant

A guy from Kansas dies

A Jelly Baby walks into a bar and starts talking to a Smartie.

A little girl asks where does poo come from?

A little old lady with failing eyesight

A man and a woman were having drinks,,,

A man moves into a nudist colony.

A man went into the proctologist's office for his first internal exam.

A man's car broke down one night in the desert...

A mother and her young inquisitive son were flying

A news reporter on an assignment met up with...

A Pom at Australian Customs

A professor of mathematics sent a fax to his wife.

A Scottish Minister

A Tip for Your Caddy?

A very good vitamin C source

A Welsh Love Story

A Woman Walks into a Bar

A young clergyman

ACTUAL CALL CENTRE CONVERSATIONS

Adventures in punctuation

After the first blind date

After the sermon

All I Need To Know About Life I Learned From A Cow.

Always the lawyer..

An actual Craig's List Peronals Ad

An effective diet

An old man had a surprise

Angus Broon of Glasgow...

Another one for the Brits - an A-Z of Essex English

Any objection to...?

Arguing on the internet

At Any Given Moment:

B & Q Job Application

Bad Timing

Batteries

Beautiful Girl

Beer quotations

Benny the Motorcyclist

Best Menopause Question Ever

Bicycle...

Bill Clinton At The Pearly Gates, Don't Hold Your Breath

Billy Connolly's Desiderata........ excerpt from his book

Blonde completing her passport application

Body Language

Breast feeding - it rocks

Broken Leg

By Gum! By Gum!

Can I See Your License Please?

Canadian National Lottery - True Story

Cartoons of Life

Chance meeting at the supermarket

Charles playing golf

Cheap skate buying perfume for his wife

Chicken surprise

Chubby Brown quotes and quotations from Roy

Cleaning Poem

Complaints from Animals

Computer programming facts, humour and subtle truths

Condom packaging

Corporate Lessons

Cosmetic Surgery in the most Intimate of Places

Cowboy from Brokeback Mountain

Crazy Wife?

Cruise Ship

Daddy, how did I come into this world?

Dating in the 60s

Deer Hunting

Devil's Problem

Did you know

Dilbert quotes from company managers

Disturbing Photos - Soldiers vs. Protestors in Bangkok, Thailand

Doctor in Newfoundland

Doctors

Doggie Style

Dorothy and Edna, two widows, are talking

Drunk driver

Ear ear

Eight Iron

English and Irish man joke

Even more bumper stickers

Facts of life

Fancy Dress Party

Father to his son:

Federal Government employee performance evaluations.

Feminine Logic

Find the Ad!

First timer

Flight attendants announcements

For those who love the philosophy of hypocrisy and ambiguity....

Fortune telling weighing machine

Frank and his new rifle

Friends

From the mouths of babes

Gassing Up

George W Bush visits a primary school...

Getting home - you just cannot win

Golf And The Bees

Golf lessons

Gone Fishing

Good manners and etiquette

Graffitti

Graveside Service

Grounds for Divorce?

Guy with a girlfriend named Lorraine - another groaner

Happiness is sharing...

Have you been a good girl?

Hearing aid and perception

Heaven

Here is something even most car buffs probably didn't know.

Holiday couple in Spain

Hospital patient

How do you spend your Chrstmas time?

How Logical is the English Language?

How the world works lately…

How to get to Heaven

How to save the airlines by Tiger Woods

How to turn your man on.....

I am called a Princess

I know my drinking capacity

I would so kill my husband!

I'm pregnant too.

If you are having a bad day remember it could be worse

In the backyard

Inner peace

Interesting Definitions of IT job People’s Designations

iPhone Protection

Irrestible to all women

Is there a god?

It is only a small error

Its the law

Johnny again

Just a Little More

Just married and...

Koala & lizard (An Australian Tale)

Late Eighties

Law

Leading professor's sexual behaviour lecture

Letter from a deep sea diver to his sister

Lie Detector

Like Lightning

Litlle Johnny and his dog that ate the homework

Little Johnny watched his mother put on her makeup

Little Johnny and his Mum at the beauty clinic

Little Johnny asked by his teacher to describe his mother

Little Johnny in class learning about the alphabet

Little Johnny learns how to make babies

Little Johnny was asked to spell...

Little Johnny’s Black Eye

Lobster and the crab are in love

Look at the Hooters on this!

Lots of Patience

Lucky 5

Maharishi Vatsyayan has stated in his Magnum Opus

Manana, Manyana

Marriage quotations and observations

Me Mudder

Mental test

Military Humour

Moans

More Political Speak and some George Bushisms

Much to their surprise the virgins awaiting Muslims in heaven were not what they expected.

Murphy's notable quotes:

My Birthday Present

My Guess Is She's married...

My son did It

Nelson Mandela "You Sign";

New eye test

New Postit Note

Nineteen things I have learnt

No moe excuses...

Nominated as the best short joke this year....

Not Paying for a Drink

Now you Know How I Feel

Obituary submitted by wife about her deceased husband

Oh, that Frank

Old Dog

Old Squid (sailor)

Olympic wrestlers

On the way to get married

One for the Brits' about the suspected terrorist attack on Sunderland

One liners version: 002

One night, a horny old geezer...

Optical illusion

Outhouse repairs

Paddy and Murphy went to London

Parrot chute

Pay Rise

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word...

Phone Sex

Piracy is not theft

Please forward this to 10 friends and...

Police chase

Ponderables

Poposal for the new emblem

Prepositions

Prostate Cancer

Pulled by the police

Qantas aircraft maintenance

Questions & answers

Quotations about age, aging, growing older, old age

Quote of the day

Quotes: Alfred E Neuman

Raped by a Cricketer

Real Notes to British Milkmen

Reducing expenditure

Research results

Rindercella

Romantic rhymes

Rottweiler

Sadist, masochist, murderer...

Safety at Play: Swimming Pool

Safety at Work: Forklifts

Safety at Work: Overloaded

Safety at work: Stepladder on ladder

Safety at work: Truck repairs

Samurai's and Flies

Scotsman at the dentist

Security Levels Around The World

Sex and Porn

Shamus and Murphy were skint and fancied a pint

Shopping!

Sister Mary and the Priest

Smart kid

Snow joke

Some of the finest double entendres on British TV & Radio

Sometimes it pays to be honest

Speedy Morris

Staff Christmas Party

Stockmarket investments

Stress management

Sunday Morning Musings

Syllable lesson

Take the Choose-A-Urinal Challenge!

Tarot reader...

Tensions of life...

Thank God your are a man

The 8 Monkeys

The American Tourist and the Englishman on a Train

The Australian went a hunting...

The bearer of bad news

The best engine design

The Bird

The bottle of wine

The bridegroom

The Busy Bar

The Car I Drive

The Christmas present from the husband who bought his wife a mood ring

The complaining customer

The Cork

The cowboy and the lesbian

The difference between graduates

The disappointed salesman retruns from the Middle East

The Donkey that fell down the well...

The efficiency expert concluded his lecture with...

The Eleventh Commandment

The family way

The financial crisis on the street

The flatmate

The Giant Gorilla

The Grandfather went a Visiting

The happy little rabbit

The hired hand

The hypnotist that stopped the wife's headaches

The insurance claim

The Irish Way of determining parenthood

The lawnmower

The little girl feeling sick in the church

The lumberyard

The married man and the secretary

The medical specimen

The morning after

The new CEO

The new milking machine

The new zoo keeper

The nun playing golf

The Old Hunter

The Other Mills

The pilot and navigator

The poor wood cutter went chopping wood by the river one day.

The Preacher went to play golf instead...

The Prodigal Returns for Confession

The Race Horse

The Regular Customer

The Rules of English Cricket

The Scot watching his first American baseball game

The sexy woman and the bartender

The Shy Welsh Village Lad

The song

The Stroke

The survivors of the 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!

The teacher asked for big words that eat things and end in ’TOR’

The tree hugging lady

The Union worker

The Voice .......

The woman answered the knock at the door and...

The Young Entrepreneur

There was once this cowboy...

They have a word for it as well

Things to ponder

Thought for today

Three comedians

Three nuns at the rugby match

Three Wishes

Time to put a Cork in it

Toes<br />

Too much Stumbling...

Toys

Trick or Treat

True story apparently

Two chickens chatting...

Two guys in a bar are talking about their wives.

Two Marines were sitting around talking one day.

Two old bats

Two Southern Ladies

Ugly woman...

Unrequited Love

Very Interesting Stuff?

Visiting the parents

Water to Wine

What a coincidence

What's for breakfast?

When I say I'm broke; I'm broke!

When to Tip the Waiter

Who is Jack Schitt?

Who wants to be a pig?

Why are we here?

Why men don't talk to each other in public toilets...

Widdle wabbits

Wisdom from a great thinker - Willie Nelson

Women' arses

Words of Wisdom from a Father to his Son

Writing Rules Clarified:

You are no longer "cool" when .....

You just can't win

You were really lucky when I knocked you over...

Zen computer error messages

17 of the best !

A big-city lawyer...

A bowl of chili

A cat named lucky

A Convicted Felon....

A dinner conversation that went wrong

A farmer was selling his peaches door to door.

A German Tourist Walks Into a McDonalds

A guy met this girl in a bar and asked...

A John Cleese message to all USA citizens

A little girl was out with her grandmother...

A little tribute to a man who made a difference: Bob Hope

A man goes to his doctors...

A man walks into a bar

A man went to the doctor...

A married couple in their early 60s

A Natural Process

A night out for Dave and his wife

A Post Office Worker

A rabbit walks into a bar...

A talent scout

A tip from a Geordie

A very short story

A wife's lover who was caught naked by her husband

A woman was driving into a small town

Aberdonians

Actual Employee Evaluations

Advertisement for Durex

After the honey

Air traffic controllers

All three were wrong

Amazing Computer Geek

An archeological teams’s recent discovery in Washington DC

An Eggplant

An old owl....

Animal conscription

Another one for the golfers

Apparently She Knows You

Arnie and Tiger

At the Urologist's

Back at School and the joys of education

Bad words

Be careful in English pubs

Bed Time Story

Beer- the cure for everything

Best and Last

Best mother-in-law joke

Big game warning from Mozambique

Bill Cosby Quotes

Birthday Wishes

Blonde jokes, questions and answers

Bra sizes Explained

Breasts or legs

Brotherly love on the golf course

C+++ creator, Bjarne Stroustrup gave an interview to the IEEE's 'Computer Magazine.

Can this marriage be saved?

Captain Rudolf Larrson

Catholic Parrots

Change of name

Chat up line

Cheating patient

Children's Science Exam answers.

Chuck Norris

Colonoscopies are no joke

Computer Dependency Test

Computer quotes

Confessions

Corporate Wisdom from Will Rogers

Council job application

Cowboy in a gay bar

Creation explained like never before

Culling the Coyotes

Damaging food

David Beckam horse riding

Delete Cookies

Devolution of British maths teaching

Did you know the devil actually wears a wig - another groaner!

Dirty Fork

Do Crappie?

Doctor&rsquo;s Second Opinion

DOE RE MI BEER, by Homer J. Simpson.

Dogs and Bars

Double jointed

Drunken stupor

Early retirement bonus

Elephant Joke

English is a crazy language.

Evil mutant attack squirrel of death

Fair is Fare

Farmer Joe's Day In Court

Father?

Feelings

Fight with the Little Woman

Fire fighters

Fit for the Job

Flight tower conversation at Dublin&rsquo;s main runway

For wine lovers and connoisseurs

Four Catholic men and a...

Frank and the dwarf

Friendship, Men vs. Women

Funny Motor Insurance Claims

Gasthof zum Lowen Restaurant

George Washington and his troops

Getting mugged

Golf and the two 'Gotchas!'

Golf Questions

Gone to market - Love Pig

Good News and Bad News for Fathers&apos; of Newly Born Baby Sons

Grandpa and his grand-daughter

Greek Style

Growing up

Hair

Happy Father's Day

Have you tried this really great new drink

Heart Attack

Heights of revenge !!!!!

Here&rsquo;s an interesting dilemma

Hollywood Squares

House Trained

How do you unlock the door?

How many of these put a smile on your face?

How to feel really good

How to hold on while the train is in motion in order to avoid falling.

How to Spell Putt

Humorous Computer Technical Support Stuff

I am getting so old that...

I need some advice on what could be a life changing decision.

I'm concerned

Idle thoughts if a retiree;s mind

If You Love Someone . . .

In the beginning

Inside Smells

Interesting dialogue between a father and his son...

Ireland Declares War on France

Is Santa Claus a woman…

Is This The Vet?

It was a miracle

Jack and Tom are having a quiet beer in a saloon bar when

Johnny and his train set

Just arrived in town and all alone

Just no pleasing some people!

Labour Pains

Latest financial news items

Law enforcement Recruitment question

Learn from the Discovery Channel

Letter from the husband leaving his wife and her reply

Life in the Australian Army

Lil' Johnny and Lil' Suzie were walking

Little Green Frogs

Little Johnny and arithmetic

Little Johnny and Susie were planning to get wed

Little Johnny asked by the teacher what his father did for a living

Little Johnny in his Biology Class

Little Johnny spending too much time playing computer games

Little Johnny was in class...

Little Red Riding Hood and the Big Bad Wolf

Logic

Losing his load

Lou Costello Calls to Buy a Computer

Luke Skywalker is suddenly awakened

Major breakthrough!!!

Marital Sexual Problem

Marvellous Answer

Medical Examination of the Young Newly Wed

Message VERY IMPORTANT NOTICE TO ALL EMPLOYEES

Millions of years ago...

Montana State Trooper on patrol

More Quickies

Mum's favourite at feeding time

Murphy's Technology Laws

My Birthday Present

My local pub is best

Naming the Baby

Never too old for Lego

New Fashion

New stock market terms

No baby talk please

No more emails from me

Normal?

Not Right

Number of the Beast 666<br />

Of course it will

Old

Old English joke about a hobo

Ole the Artist

On arrival in Hell

Once there was a beautiful woman...

One for the Scots...

One liners version: 003

One Upmanship Between Ladies

Oral sex

Overheard in the Barbers Shop

Paddy Murphy walks ino his local

Partners

Pencil

PERKS OF BEING OVER 50

Piano

Planting the seed...

Pleasure is a mental state

Policy

Ponderisms version: 001

Popular quotations and Thai translations

Profound

Prostatectomy

Pulled over in Georgia

Quality

Quick One for the Brits'

Quotations all about tax

Quotes and humour from Groucho Marx

Rabbi's sermon

Real answers taken over the years on Larry Gogan’s radio show in Ireland.

Real Reason

Reducing your ration

Respect your Elders!

Rindercella and her sugly isters.

Ronaldo, Luis Figo and James McFadden

Royal Navy Reports submitted by Mr Tim

Safari and the Lion

Safety at work: Extended ladder

Safety at work: Hedge trimming

Safety at Work: PPC - Personal Protection

Safety at Work: Street Lighting

Safety at Work: Walk the Plank

Sausage Factory

Searching For a Missing CIA Agent in Ireland

Senior Couple Engagement

Sex and the economy

Sharon's birthday present

Should Have Quit...

Size does not matter

Smart kids

Snowhite and the Seven Dwarfs

Some One-Liners From The Edinburgh Fringe Festival

Spaghetti

Spending Money in the USA

Statistics

Story of a Challenged Senior

Stung by a bee while playing golf

Sunshine!

Symptoms of being over 30

Taken for a Ride

Tax Audit - Waste Not Want Not

Terrible Truths and other principles of disaster

The cricket match

The agronomist

The American tourist visits a castle

The Australian, Irishman and the Scouser

The Beer Scooter

The Best Way To Get A Man...

The Birthday Gift

The boy who loved tractors - another groaner

The Bronze Rat

The Butcher Dance - somebody must like this one.

The casino

The Church Organist

The Condom

The corruption trial

The Current Financial Crisis

The Dinner Party

The divorce hearing

The drunk staggered up to hotel reception and demanded another room

The elderly couple

The engineers and the accountants go to a London meeting

The Farmers Son in College

The first date with a man that she had fancied for a long time...

The Flight Stewardess

The girl was cornered at a party

The grandmother and her grandchild

The head waiter

The hitchhiker

The ideal partner

The intensive care patients

The Jesus and Satan Competition

The lawyer and his unpaid client&apos;s bill

The Little Turtle

The Magical Frog

The Marvels of Modern Medicine

The Merit Badge

The most expensive vehicle per mile?

The New Chandelier for the Synagogue

The New Oxford Dictionary's latest update on definition of the following words

The newly weds

The nursing home

The old man

The paratrooper

The plucked parrot

The Pope

The pregnant wife

The Profitable Latex Factory

The Racist's Hell

The repair man

The sales contest

The Scottish Student

The sheep farmer

The sign in the men's room

The Special Golf Ball

The Student Proctologist and Country Music

The sympathetic wife

The teacher's assignment

The two campers

The used car lot.

The voice from above?

The woodpecker might have to go!

The Young Lovers on a Winter Vacation

There were these three guys outside of a bar

They met in hell...

Thinking Ahead

Thought you might be interested in a glimpse of the future.

Three ducks walk into a bar...

Three Priests

Tiagra for when 18 holes in not enough

Time to start swearing

Tommy Cooper

Top 10 Reasons E-mail Is Like a Penis

Traffic Stop

Tried It Once But Didn't Like It

True story apparently!

Two dwarfs

Two hungry tramps

Two Martians

Two old drunks were lapping them up at a bar.

Two strangers talking on the airoplane

UK's Magic Wellness Stick

USA States and their mottos

Viagra Alternative

Waiting For The Bus

Water vs alcohol

What Causes Arthritis?

What's Your Name

When it comes to sex

Where are we?

Who Is Next?

Who's Driving

Why British Newspapers are More Fun to Read

Why Men Don't Write Advice Columns

Wife .v. Mistress

Wishful thinking

Women's Lib.

Words of Wit and Wisdom

Yellow 24

You asked

You know you're from Canada when .............

Young O'Donnell rushed into a church...

10 Fingers

20 shots of scotch

A Bit of Physics Humour

A Brand New Small Car for Women

A Christmas gift

A couples first night

A discussion on the Hereafter

A father's advice to his son

A Grandmother's Letter to her Grandson

A guy offers to buy a drink

A Lesson to be learnt from an ant

A little old lady in court

A Load of Blarney about the Irish Blarney Stone

A man goes to the doctor and says "Doc, I think I might be gay."

A man walks into a bar and...

A man went to the police station

A message from God to the atheist professor

A new cure for worms

A Night With &quot;The Girls&quot;

A Prayer for the Stressed

A real groaner

A Talking Parrot

A trouble shared

A Viagra advert that should get first prize

A Wise Old Man

A Woman was out golfing one day when she hit the ball into the woods

Absolutely Hilarious Computer Quotes

Adam and Eve

Advice from a sex therapist

After the Honeymoon

Airspace violation protocol

All Torn-up

Amish and Elevator

An Aussie went into an empty bar...

An elderly couple were celebrating their sixtieth anniversary.

And he said...

Another confession

Another pint of heavy for Hughie from Glasgow

Are you a believer in God and Jesus?

Arnold and his wife were cleaning out the attic one day...

Aussie housewife slipped in the bathroom

Back in the good old days when RawPower

Ballmer Peak

Be Happy

Beer

Before and After Marriage

Best comeback line ever?

Best Venn Diagram Ever

Big Mac Index

Billy Connolly Quotations

Blessed are the young for they shall inherit the National Debt

Blue Balls

Bran muffins

British One Liners

Bumper stickers

Call to Prayer

Can you identify the facial expressions of these women?

Captain's Announcement

Caught in the act

Charades

Chat up line overheard in a bar

Check your stress factor here

Chinese Torture

Cinderella was now 95 years old.

Colour Test - how many times before you can get it right?

Computer diagnosis from a urine sample

Computer Terminology

CONGRATULATIONS TO ALL THE KIDS WHO WERE BORN IN THE 1920's, 30's 40's, 50's , 60's &amp; 70's !!

Cosmetic Surgery

Country Funeral . . .

Cowboy in Texas

Creation of God's country

Cure for Swine Flu Fever

Darling have you ever cheated on me?

Dead Penguins

Demographic forecast of Europe 2015

Diagnosis

Difference between the sexes

Discrimination Against Batchelors

Do Not touch

Doctor's opinion

Does any of this sound somewhat familiar?

Don't Be An Oxymoron...

Down on the Farm

Duck hunting

Easy?

Embarrassing Medical Exams

English language...

Excerpts from a book called Disorder in the American Courts

Family golf story

Fast forward to 2006

Fatherly Advice from the Marriage Counselor

Female benefits....

Finally Learned What Service Means

First Day At School

Five surgeons are discussing who has the best patients to operate on.

Flu update

Fore!

Four good lessons to remember

Free beer

From 'Monty Python'

Funny shop names

Genetic Result

German Engineering

God was planning on taking a vacation

Golf balls

Golf with a lady and four lawyers

Good Driver

Good News and Bad News from the Airline Pilot about a Hijacker

Grandparents and kids

Greener Grass...

Guardian Angel

Halloween Party

Hard to argue with Indian wisdom...

Health

Heart attacks

Help desk

Here's one for farangs in Asia

Holy Joes Desiderata

Housework

How fights start with Wife

How Many Slices of Toast for Breakfast

How to be cruel to old guys

How to keep fit for the elderly...

How to stop smoking

Humour

I bet you can't...

I walked past a mental hospital today...

I'm Cured!

Idle Thoughts of a Retiree's Wandering Mind

Im memory of Leonard Ball who hated fat people

In the mouth

Insulted By A Druggist

Interesting thoughts

Irish border crossing

Is Sex Work Or Play?

Is your Dad home?

It's all in the colours

Jesus and Saint Peter are golfing.

Johnny at the auction

Just between us!

Just the one wish

Ladies Man

Latest News from Liverpool Echo

Laws of Golf

Learning to live togoether

Letter of Complaint to the Railway

Life is short so play naked

Lipstick in School

Little Johhny and his father

Little Johnny and Fascinate in a Sentence

Little Johnny and the horse with the broken leg

Little Johnny asks his father where his intelligence comes from

Little Johnny in the maths class

Little Johnny to smart for his class

Little Johnny's Homework Excuse

Little Sarah

Logic from 'the suit'

Lost and famished in the forest

Louisiana Law

Lumber purchase

Making it Last

Marriage Bliss

Mathmatical knowledge of the American public

Medical research has confirmed...

Midas Touch

Miscellaneous - A Walking Economy

Moods of the sexes

More Quotations

Murphy's Car is Stolen

Musical Monks

My Daddy Smokes

My mother taught me...

Naughty Parrot

New beer slogan

New Knob Face Lift Procedure

New Virus Alert

No Bonking!

No Nursing Home for me

Nostalgia

Not Too Old Yet......

Nun and a Priest

Offside rule explained to women

Old Age

Old Fred’s hospital bed

Ole the farmer buys a new cow from Nordakota Cow

On arriving late at home

One for Halloween?

One for the Scousers

One liners: B - D

One, Two, Three

Orchestra Drummer

Overheard in the supermarket

Paddy takes the Irish accountantancy exam

Passing Time

Penis facts

Pete - Aw #%#% - Is that you

Pick Three Hymns!!!

Playing

Poem for women

Political correctness

Ponderisms version: 002

Position is everything

Programming languages compared with women

Proverbs - According to 6year olds

Puns ver 002

Quasimodo

Quick Thinking - Definitely

Quotations from actual students essays

Quotes from some girls

Rabies

Real Estate Salesman's Honesty

Reasonable wife

Register software

Rest In Peace

Rock beats paper but nothing beats...

Ronnie Barker's best lines

Rules for Writers:

Safe sex

Safety at Work: Facemask

Safety at work: Helping hands

Safety at Work: Safety Helmet

Safety at Work: Street Lighting Again

Safety at Work: Welding Mask

Saved by the...

Seasonal Greetings

Senior love story

Sex Dolls

Shipwreck survivors

Should you forward this joke?

Sleeping Late

Smoking's Rights

Snowplow warning

Some Things You Just Can't Explain

Spanish lessons

Spike Milligan

Steve Job&rsquo;s Latest Invention

Strange Cornwall Witch and the Hamster Story

Su Wong marries Lee Wong...

Superman

T-shirt slogans

Taking a female to bed

Tech' support for online banking

Test to see which one is the blonde

The environmentalist

The alligator

The Angry Husband

The bad and ugly king had a beautiful girl as a captive.- another groaner

The beggar and his regular customer

The best woman to marry

The blind pilots

The boyfriend

The budding actor

The cab driver....

The change of plea

The Church Testimony Meeting

The Confession

The court ruling on Viagra being made available free on the UK's National Health Service

The cutest ass you will ever see

The dinner table conversation

The doctor &amp; the elderly man.

The Duck Hunter

The Electric Arm Replacement

The Eternal Optimist

The father of the child

The first man

The gambler &amp; taxi-driver

The girls' night out

The Grateful Painter

The headache

The Hotel Bill . . .

The Importance of Walking

The interview for a salesman with an uncontrollable wink

The Job Application

The Lecture

The Lobster and the Crab

The man who forgot to buy his wife a Christmas turkey

The mating game

The mistress

The Naked Man and the Little Old Lady

The new doctor

The New Recruit

The newlyweds

The Nymphomanic and the Doctor

The old man and his young bride

The Pastor's Cat

The Poker Player

The Pope arrives at JFK

The Present from France

The Psychiatrist and the Proctologist

The Ranch

The retired gentleman

The Salesman

The Sea Burial of Uncle Seamus

The shiny new motorcycle

The Skeleton In The Ravine

The splint

The student to the sex researcher

The talking newborn baby

The terrible flood

The two old maid virgin sisters

The ventriloquist

The wedding night

The world expert on European wasps ...

The Young Pastor and the Church Organist

There were two canaries that lived in a cage

They walk among us!

This guy and his newlywed wife...

Thoughts on Exercise

Three goats let loose in school

Three professionals discussing the oldest profession

Tick Warning

Tipping the Waitress

Tommy Cooper - Dont' jump off the roof dad

Top drawer one liners<br />

Tragedy of the Dead Cat

Triplets

Turtle Mugging

Two elderly Irish drinking buddies...

Two IT guys talking in a bar...

Two men sat at the bar

Two Old Ladies Chatting

Two vampires were sitting - a groaner

Under The Influence

Van Gogh's Family Tree

Viagra prescribed by the doctor

Wal-Mart Interview

Wedding Plans

What goes on in Nursing homes

Wheelbarrow Method

When it is OK to spank a child

Where can I buy some?

Who packs your parachute

Whoops after the guy had a circumcision operation mixup

Why Did the Computer Chicken Cross the Road?

Why the iPhone is tougher than Chuck Norris

Wife caught in the act by hubbie and cabbie

Woman goes to the doctor

Wonder Cream

Work

Yo mama is so fat...

You can&rsquo;t fool me

You know you're living in 2005 when...

Your Annual Dementia Test