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 Daily Quote Taoism: shit happens<br/>
Buddhism: if shit happens, it isn't really shit<br/>
Islam: if shit happens, it is the will of Allah<br/>
Catholicism: if shit happens, you deserve it<br/>
Judaism: why does this shit always happen to us? <br/>
Atheism: I don't believe this shit<br/>

Dorothy and Edna, two widows, are talking.

... driving into a small town ...

10 Husbands, Still a Virgin

A Bit of Physics Humour

A circus magician

A dinner conversation that went wrong

A few answers to commonly asked pregnancy questions by both men and women.

A Grandmother's Letter to her Grandson

A Jelly Baby walks into a bar and starts talking to a Smartie.

A little tribute to a man who made a difference: Bob Hope

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery.

A man with a dog walks into a bar

A Natural Process

A penny for your thoughts

A rabbit walks into a bar...

A timeless lesson on how consultants can make a difference for an organization.

A Visit To The IRS - Internal Revenue Service?

A young clergyman

Actual Employee Evaluations

After a long night of making love...

After the sermon

Always the lawyer..

An Australian Genie!

Animal conscription

Any objection to...?

At the Urologist's

Bank Robber

Be prepared for this interview question

Beer Cannon Montage

Best and Last

Beware when you come home!

Bill Cosby Quotes

Blonde Jokes

Breakfast Joke

By Gum! By Gum!

Can you read this !!??

Caught in the act

Charades

Chatup line

Chinese Torture

Clean underwear

Computers & Internet - General - Get The Most From The I.T. Dept.

Consultants in the restaurant

Couple on their first date

Crazy Wife?

Curtain Rods.... a happy ending

Darwin Awards

Deer Hunting

Did you enjoy the sex?

Dirty Fork

Doberman Dies

Doctor's prescription

Dogs and Bars

Drunken stupor

Early retirement bonus

Encore

Essex girls moved to Glasgow?

Famous composers and movie stars

Father?

Female Prayers

Find the Ad!

First Night

Flight attendants announcements

Fortune telling weighing machine

Free beer

From the "For Sale" columns,

G W Bush was sleeping when suddenly he awoke

Getting A Round Of Golf, What to tell the missus

Golf and the two 'Gotchas!'

Golf Questions

Good News and Bad News

Gross but Innovative

Guns, doctors and lawyers

Harley Davidson

Health & Fitness - Old Age - Dangerous Driving Penalties

Heaven

Here's one for farangs in Asia

Honeymoon confessions

How the internet was all started, it is true, honest!

How to stop smoking

I am called a Princess

I'm Lost

In Case

Indian Mating Season

Interesting dialogue between a father and his son...

Is that rain?

It is only a small error

Johnny and his train set

Just between us!

King Frederick II Visit To A Jail

Latest News from Liverpool Echo

Lawyer jokes

Letter from a deep sea diver to his sister

Like Father Like...

Little Johhny and his father

Little Johnny And The Circus Clown

Little Johnny drawing

Little Johnny to smart for his class

Little Johnny's Mother

Little Sister

Lola's Graduation

Lost Purse

Lucky 5

Man of the House

Marvellous Answer

Mental test

Miscellaneous - A Walking Economy

More Quotations

Murphy's Technology Laws

My Daddy Smokes

Nelson Mandela &quot;You Sign&quot;;

New Living Will Form

No calls

Not Right

Obituary

Old Age

Ole the Artist

On arriving late at home

One for the Brits

One Liners

One Upmanship Between Ladies

Organic

Paddy and Murphy went to London

Passing Time

PERKS OF BEING OVER 50

Pinch my nipples

Please don't forget the title!

Police chase

Ponderisms

Potentially vs Realistically

Prostate Cancer

Pulled by the police

Quasimodo

Quotations

Quotes I like

Real Estate Salesman's Honesty

Reasonable wife

Register software

Right and Wrong

Ronaldo, Luis Figo and James McFadden

Safari and the Lion

Saved by the...

Seasonal Greetings

Service fee

sharon"s birthday present

Sid the Inventor

Smart kids

Snowplow warning

Something to look forward to...

Special sandals

Staff Christmas Party

Strange Cornwall Witch and the Hamster Story

Sunshine!

Symptoms of being over 30

Tapeworm Cure

Terrible Truths and other principles of disaster

The (i)rate of exchange

The American Tourist and the Englishman on a Train

The Australian, Irishman and the Scouse

The best cure for persistent headaches! !

The Birthday Gift

The brain is a wonderful organ.,,

The burglar

The Car I Drive

The Christmas Present

The Condom

The corruption trial

The diet

The Dirty Professor

The Duck Hinter

The engineers and the accountants go to a London meeting

The father of the child

The first witness

The GI

The grandmother and her grandchild

The headache

The Husband Store and The Wives Store Across The Road

The Inexperienced Curry Taster

The inventor

The lawyer

The Little Turtle

The Magical Frog

The mating game

The moral of the story

The New Chandelier for the Synagogue

The newly weds

The oil shortage

The operation

The pilot and navigator

The Pope

The Primary School Counsellor

The Race Horse

The Regular Customer

The Rules of English Cricket

The Scot watching his first American baseball game

The sheep farmer

The sneezing woman

The stowaway

The survivors of the 40's, 50's, 60's and 70's!

The terrible flood

The used car lot.

The wife returned from the doctor

The Young Pastor and the Church Organist

Things Only a Mom Can Teach

Thought you might be interested in a glimpse of the future.

Three Priests

Time to put a Cork in it

Toes<br />

Top drawer one liners<br />

Tree huggers

True story apparently

Two chickens chatting...

Two IT guys talking in a bar...

Two old drunks were lapping them up at a bar.

Two young lovers on a romantic winter vacation

Unrequited Love

Viagra Alternative

Water vs alcohol

What goes on in Nursing homes

Wheelbarrow Method

When to Tip the Waiter

Who Wants To Be A Millionaire...

Why men don't talk to each other in public toilets...

Wife's work on the sly

Women's Lib.

World's easiest quiz

You are no longer "cool" when .....

You know you're living in 2005 when...

My local pub is best

... good manners and etiquette ...

17 of the best !

A blonde was summoned to court to...

A computer instructor's observation

A discussion on the Hereafter

A Flat-chested Young Lady Went To Dr. Smith

A Greek and an Italian were drinking coffee...

A Little Boy's Prayers

A love story..

A man walks into a bar

A man's car broke down one night in the desert...

A new cure for worms

A Pom at Australian Customs

A real groaner

A tip from a Geordie

A Wise Old Man

Aberdonians

Adam and Eve

After the first blind date

Air traffic controllers

Amazing Computer Geek

An effective diet

Another confession

Are you an American?

B &amp; Q Job Application

Bastard!

Bear facts

Beer quotations

Best comeback line ever?

Bicycle...

Billy Connolly Quotations

Bob Hill and his wife Betty are vacationing in Europe.

British Weather

Call to Prayer

Can't Miss Pick-Up Lines

Cell Mate

Charles Atals

Cheating patient

Christopher Columbus's first words

Colonoscopies are no joke

Condom packaging

Corporate Lessons

Cowboy from Brokeback Mountain

Creation explained like never before

Customs declarations

Dating in the 60s

Delete Cookies

Did you know

Discrimination Against Batchelors

Doctor in Newfoundland

Doctors

Don't you love me no more

Duck hunting

Easy?

English and Irish man joke

Evil mutant attack squirrel of death

Fancy Dress Party

Fatherly advice to his daughter

Fight with the Little Woman

Fire fighters

First timer

For those who love the philosophy of hypocrisy and ambiguity....

Four good lessons to remember

Free Sex With Petrol Station Fillup

From the "For Sale" columns,

Gassing Up

Getting even

Golf balls

Golfers be grateful

Gorilla

Grounds for Divorce?

Hair

Harry the Eagle

Hearing aid and perception

Help desk

Hired help

Hospital patient

How to feel really good

How to turn a woman on

I bet you can't...

I'm not Happy

In Pharmacology.............

Inner peace

Interesting thoughts

Is that sex?

It's all in the colours

Johnny at the auction

Just married and...

Ladies Man

Latest report - Calories Used

Lawyers and charity

Letter of Complaint to the Railway

Like Lightning

Little Johhny on the train

Little Johnny and arithmetic

Little Johnny in biology class

Little Johnny wanted to...

Little Johnny's mother

Little Tommy and hist Grandma&rsquo;

London Times Obituary

Lost the bet

Luke Skywalker is suddenly awakened

Manana, Manyana

Maud, Mavis and Ethel

Message VERY IMPORTANT NOTICE TO ALL EMPLOYEES

Misunderstanding

Motel of the future

Musical Monks

My Dear Husband

New beer slogan

New name for a beer

No laughing matter

Now you Know How I Feel

Of course it will

Old Butch the Rooster

Olympic condoms

On the Bus.

One for the Scots...

One liners

One, Two, Three

Outhouse repairs

Paddy Murphy walks ino his local

Password!!

Peter Kaye-isms., True. For those that may have missed it.

Planting the seed...

Pleasure is a mental state

Policy

Ponderisms

Prepositions

Prostatectomy

Pulled over in Georgia

Qucik answer

Quotations about age, aging, growing older, old age

Quotes: Alfred E Neuman

Real letter to the bank

Recruiting for the Air Force

Relationships Before And After

Rindercella

Ronnie Barker's best lines

Safe sex

School of Psychiatry at Harvard University

Second try!

Sex Dolls

Shipwreck survivors

Singing in the Shower

Smoking's Rights

Some of the finest double entendres on British TV & Radio

Sometimes it pays to be honest

Speedy Morris

Statistics

Street vendor and the lawyer

Superman

Tae a far-apologies to Robbie Burns

Tarot reader...

Thailand headlines

The 8 Monkeys

The American tourist visits a castle

The Battle of Trafalgar - revisited

The Best Way To Get A Man...

The blind pilots

The bridegroom

The Busy Bar

The casino

The Church Organist

The Confession

The Courting Couple

The difference between graduates

The divorce hearing

The duck hunter

The Eternal Optimist

The female brain cell

The flatmate

The girls' night out

The Hamster

The Hi-Tech Milking Machine

The hypnotist

The insurance claim

The Jesus and Satan Competition

The lawyer

The Lobster and the Crab

The married couple

The medical specimen

The morning after

The New iTit Musical Breast Implant

The newlyweds

The old gentleman walks into a bar

The Other Mills

The plucked parrot

The Pope arrives at JFK

The Profitable Latex Factory

The Racist's Hell

The repair man

The sales contest

The Scottish Student

The shiny new motorcycle

The song

The Stroke

The sympathetic wife

The Three Little Pigs

The ventriloquist

The world expert on European wasps ...

Thermos flask

Things that are difficult to say when you're drunk:

Thoughts on Exercise

Three Vampires in a Bar

Time to start swearing

Tommy Cooper

Topical

Trick or Treat

True story apparently!

Two dwarfs

Two lawyers stranded on a desert island

Two Old Ladies Chatting

UFO runs short of fuel and lands...

Van Gogh's Family Tree

Visiting friends

Wedding Plans

What Is A Fox Pass?

When a Lady Has To Fart

Where are we?

Who wants to be a pig?

Why there are no snakes in Ireland

Wishful thinking

Wonder Cream

Yellow 24

You asked

You try your best but....

Pope and Jews

... rain on your parade

20 shots of scotch

A blonde's last word.

a cowboy and the indians

A Farang came out of a toilet...

A fricken Elephant

A guy met this girl in a bar and asked...

A little old lady

A man goes to his doctors...

A man walks into a bar and...

A married couple in their early 60s

A news reporter on an assignment met up with...

A Prayer for the Stressed

A Rough Night

A trouble shared

A woman goes shopping in Big W

Abstain from Sex

Adventures in punctuation

After the honey

All Done

Amish and Elevator

Anger Management, I do feel better!!!

Another pint of heavy for Hughie from Glasgow

Are you included in the following one hundred?

Bad memory

Bastard!

Beautiful Girl

Before and After Marriage

Best mate

Big Mac Index

Billy Connolly's Desiderata........ excerpt from his book

Body Language

Broken Fence in DC

Calling in Sick

Captain Rudolf Larrson

Cell Mates

Charles playing golf

Cherry Vanilla Ice Cream

Chubby Brown quotations

Coming out of the closet

Confessions

Corporate Wisdom from Will Rogers

Cowboy in Texas

cross examination

Daddy, how did I come into this world?

David Beckam horse riding

Depressed

Difference between the sexes

Distressed Widow from Scotland

Doctor&rsquo;s Second Opinion

DOE RE MI BEER, by Homer J. Simpson.

Drink to that

Duck walks into a bar...

Eight Iron

English is a crazy language.

Excerpts from a book called Disorder in the American Courts

Farmer Joe's Day In Court

Federal Government employee performance evaluations.

Finally Learned What Service Means

First Day At School

Fit for the Job

Fore!

Fourth Marriage

Friends

From the mouths of babes

Geography of a woman

Getting mugged

Golf caddies

Good Lawyer

Graffitti

Growing up

Halloween Party

Have you tried this really great new drink

Heart attacks

Help hubby

Holiday couple in Spain

House Trained

How to get to Heaven

How to turn your man on.....

I Hate My Job

Idle Thoughts of a Retiree's Wandering Mind

In the backyard

Inside Smells

Ireland Declares War on France

Is This The Vet?

Its the law

Judge and the Prostitute

Just no pleasing some people!

Ladies Night Out

Latest virus

Leading professor's sexual behaviour lecture

Letters to Santa Claus

Lisa was called to serve for jury duty...

Little Johnny

Little Johnny and Fascinate in a Sentence